Where have I been?
Still trying to find myself.
After checking out of the medical ward last Friday, I hadn't allowed myself time to truly recover. As a consequence, I ended up being admitted to the looney bin on Monday night when I finally crashed.
Physically, I had been so shattered by the overdose. Mentally and emotionally, I was not prepared to face the world again. In a way, the last few days in the psych ward was time to talk and think things through.
Details became known to me through talking to my case manager, V, the pdoc, the nurses.
The person who found me last week stumbling around the hospital car park was a mental health worker, so she knew me. She found me with my shoes in my hand. I guess I knew enough to grab my shoes but not enough to put them on. Anyway - she bundled me into her car and drove me over to Emergency. By the time we got there, I was unconscious.
I had a succession of grand mal seizures. They gave me a Glasgow Coma Scale (GCS) of 3, which is the lowest you could score on it. It is associated with deep coma and death. They were so worried they contacted my brother in America.
That's another thing I have to deal with now. I feel I've let him down. He was so worried about me, and all I wanted to do last week was brush him off.
I'm such an ass.