Sometimes I see the light. Sometimes I don't.
Today the darkness overwhelms me, despite the sun shinning just beyond the windows of my desk, as if taunting me. I should be smiling and happy after the rain, wind gusts and darkened skies have over ruled the past week. I should be outside, basking in the light of day, rejoicing in the one perfect day that we will have before the skies close in on us again. But I want to burrow deeper into my duvet and hide from the world.
I should want to go out there and run, but my body feels heavy. Movements are slow as if my joints are pasted with glue. It is a perfect day to run, but my heart is beating with anxiety and it is hard to walk without becoming leadened with dread.
What is wrong with me?