Wednesday, December 05, 2007


I'm sitting somewhere between hopelessness and despair.

I am speaking, but my voice sounds tinny and far away, disembodied. My words form in the back of my mind and then disappears. Sometimes it is too late to catch them and send them out. My mesage is unclear. The words fall and tumble out my mouth. I'm saying everything yet nothing at all.

I am moving, but my limbs hang loosely around me and my movements are jerky and forced. I am a puppet on a string and I am performing. The act of my life.

The tears... are real. They roll down my cheeks and fall upon the floor. It is raining,... I can make it rain today.


James said...

Thinking of you...

pjbrubak said...

You're a good writer. That helps, doesn't it? To express the pain? It helps me.

Zathyn Priest said...

I certainly know that feeling of despair you're in and I wish I could do or say something to ease it for you.

Being able to write is a gift you have and it at least gets those thoughts and feelings out of our heads, if only for a moment.

My thoughts are with you and I hope this dark cloud lifts soon.

Best Wishes,

butterflies said...

Im here for you.

Marie said...

I am sorry you are feeling badly! The holidays always bring out these kinds of feelings in people!

Keep your chin up!

+PHc said...

I'm raining too. Love from a stranger.