Tuesday, June 24, 2008

"Where to elect there is but one"

I've decided no, I can't live like this.

I've decided no, it's agonizing at its best when suicide is the only option.

What did you call it? Hobson's choice. I'd never heard of it before. But there you go, educating me as you do.

I'll never know as much as you do. But I do know pain. I know loneliness. I know the kind of gnawing pain that eats at you, like little piranha, like hundreds of little piranha... chewing away your insides until the bleeding is like a flow of a river.

That's what you do to me. That's what you do to me when I can't see you, or can't talk to you, or can't remember in my head exactly how you look, can't recall for the life of me, how you sound.

But I saw you didn't I? When you drove past me, blew past me as I struggled up that hill. You wouldn't have known it was me, of course. You wouldn't have seen me because I'm invisible. No one ever sees me. Sometimes I don't even see myself.

Sometimes I'm not there at all. But you are. Only you. It's all you.

2 comments:

Banjk said...

please, please, please enable comments for other URLs?

Hehehe.

Nice to read you again!

butterflies said...

Whatever you are angry at its not HER...she cant help being sick.
Im sure she tries to keep going as we all do.
And none of us wants to let you down Polar.