Are you familiar with that sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach, as if the ground would drop below your feet so that you would free fall into nothingness, and you realise that that blackness is only a heart beat away and it would swallow you whole? And you know that nothing will ever be the same again? Are you familiar with that feeling of grief before you ever lost anything, but it was the anticipation of that loss that you grieve deeply and inconsolably?
Do the tears ever flood you from the back of your brain and pour out your eyes in torrents? Does your heart ever clench tightly in your chest and you can't let go and you can't take in a breath because if you do, you know that you would drown in your own tears?
Do you ever know what you can't have and yet you desperately want it, need it?
What do you do when someone hands you a life sentence? What do you do? What do you say?
How can life possibly be ok ever again?