Tuesday, August 25, 2009


Things have settled down a little. Last week was rough, but V saw me through it. I need to remember what happens when I'm under stress, and apparently I was over the last month or so, stuff relating to work.

It was good to have a bit of a debrief session with V today in which she highlighted the importance of having some sort of plan for when I go fruity. Well, she didn't put it that way, but basically, for when I start to unravel.

There is a point, though, I think, when I cross over the point of no return when nothing will persuade my mind back from that edge and that inevitably I will find myself falling off that ledge. But this time, this time I could be talked through it, and that was good because now I know it can be done if caught (noticed) early enough. And that's the key to success or failure - catching it early enough. Apparently there are signs.

V acknowledged there is a lot of work for me to do here. And that we're not going to sort it out in an hour. But it's a start,... and I suppose I WILL at least try to put something together.


Anonymous Drifter said...

I'm glad your session went well.

Aqua said...

Hi Polar Bear,
This is very interesting. I woulld love it if you could share some of the early signs so I have some examples to understand/learn my own.

Just Be Real said...

Sounds very promising and encouraging!!

Suzanne said...

This is sounding great! I had the same conversation with G - and at that time he asked me to relate to him my stress/mental levels on a scale of 1-10 just before I was about to do something "mad". Back then I would go from 1-9 in about 60 seconds and you're right, when you're at 9 there is *NO* coming back from there. You are going to do something loopy. I was totally unable to distinguish between a zero and a 6. It was all or nothing. I would go from "sane" to overdose in 20 minutes.

But... something happened, and I don't know what the trigger was, but I was able to start identifying the fact that I was about to go insane in about 2 hours if I didn't get help. Then I was able to say "I'm at level 6, approaching 7 and I need help".

I'm really pleased to hear that you and V are going to tackle this/go down this route - it's really great and I hope that it can be as positive as my experience has been.


Borderline Lil said...

You're SO right, PB - knowing, recognising and acting on the early warning signs is the only way to be in control of illness. It's great that you have support from V, makes all the difference.

MB said...

Wow, that was quite a break through! Really encouraging! It's good that you have this experience to relate back to now as you begin to recognise the triggers and signs!